How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Procrastination

 

As is probably most unwise when trying to write, I'm reading a book on writing, called "Rules of Thumb," in which a bunch of writers give writing tips. Most are crap, but there are definite gems every now and again. One of them notes that a graduate research project revealed that 100% of writers of all varieties procrastinate. This must mean that procrastination is part of the writing process.

Which is great news, since that's what I'm doing right now.

I've also discovered a new medium of writing (aside from screenwriting) that is incredibly rewarding: children's fiction. Why that, of all things?

Here are the constant limitations that I find myself consciously or unconsciously imposing on myself during the normal screenwriting process:

• Restrict the story and setting to feasibility on a low (or low-ish) budget
• Avoid stereotype or cliche characters; make sure each one has a compelling arc and a complex multi-layered personality
• Generally follow a three-act structure as a basic skeleton
• Remember that adults want to see adult things like violence, sex, and profanity; at the very least explore the depths of emotional turmoil and the human experience
• Deliver something new and fresh, but package it in a way that's familiar and accessible

Here are the limitations I'm finding writing prose fiction for children:

• None; as long as your inner 8-year-old isn't bored, do whatever the hell you want

My kid's book is about a family that lives in a windmill-powered ship. They travel to strange lands having odd adventures. That's it.

It's incredibly therapeutic. Whenever I'm tired of chiseling away at dark, emotional stories of philosophy, death, redemption, and conflict, which take place in accessible locations, and feature characters with pages of background and soul-searching needs and desires, I write a little light-hearted tale about an awesome ancient city under a desert populated by mummies.

Let me tell you, after over ten years of writing stories which I knew I could go outside with a camera and make the next day, it's lovely to reach way back into my imagination and see what was locked in the "never gonna be possible" box (of course, it would be a dream to one day make these stories as a stop-motion animated film or TV show...).

'Cause I'm feeling charitable, here's a rough cross-section I did of the Merry Mariner, the adventuring ship.

Of Second and Third Drafts

I'm discovering that I write in two-draft cycles. The first draft is a messy splatter of ideas, roughly kept in line by spotty and sometimes vague ideas of plot and character. Draft two is the clean-up. Characters and dialogue are straightened out and correctly tuned, scenes are combed straight of excessive description and other unnecessary frills, and themes, motifs, and plant / payoff elements are identified and strengthened.

This all sounds very orderly, but draft two is still, generally, a mess. It also at this point has existed entirely inside my own skull, and desperately needs outside opinion. So I send it to my closest and most trusted confidants, for what will hopefully be a vigorous and merciless review.

Then I wait, because they've got more urgent things to do than read my scattered, bloated script. I pace the room purposefully and drink a fair amount of wine (I'm in France, dammit, leave me alone), generally feeling lousy about my abilities.

I've now received their stern but fair input, and am working on draft three, feeling reinvigorated. It can be fixed! It can and must be made better! In order to allow myself to get back into the swing of things, however, I need another messy draft. While this one won't be as messy as draft one, draft three will still require a draft four clean-up. My writing cap and my proofreading cap rest on very different pegs - it's impossible, for me, to do both at the same time.

This "free" draft gives me a lot of room to screw up, which is what writing is all about - screwing up over and over again, less and less as you go on, until at the end there's something that is, ideally, in its Least Screwed Up state. Like radiation, of course, it never goes away completely. You just chip and carve at it until you can say, "well, that'll have to do for now."

Most writers have to leave it at that. Luckily, I'm also a filmmaker, so the tinkering's just begun. The Least Screwed Up script is just the beginning. Then begins the process of Least Screwing Up the casting, design, rehearsals, production, and editing.

Anyway, enough procrastinating. Back to screwing up writing.

Of Features and Web Comics

Ten (10) days after landing in Lyon, France, I have conceived of, outlined, plotted, written, deconstructed, re-outlined, rebuilt, and re-written a feature film script. It's on draft 2 and going out for external review (aka, my friends will tell me what sucks). After that and a third draft, it'll be out to ex-professors and other more practiced eyes.

This wouldn't be notable (I've got a shelf of failed first runs at feature scripts) except for a few things. First, I'm excited about it from beginning to end. Most script ideas rely on a single spark of inspiration which guides you through the tedious (to me) process of writing a 90+ page screenplay. With this one, I want to dive right in to doing more and more drafts as often as possible. It's almost obsession - and I think that's a good thing. I haven't felt the same tug since La Nina del Desierto.

Second, it's designed to be made on a shoestring if necessary. All the parts were written specifically thinking about actors I know that I've already worked with before. Most of the locations are places I already have access to or feel confident stealing (shooting at without a permit). Assuming all the ducks lined up, I could get this baby started in less than a month, if that's what it came down to.

And that leads directly to the third reason why it's notable, which is that because I potentially have nothing to risk, I've written it for no one else except myself. I never allowed the external world to sit on my shoulder and say, "does this have enough drama? Is it funny enough? Is it interesting enough?" If something wasn't funny or interesting to me, it was taken out of the script early on. As such, it's a pretty niche film, but god damn if it won't be fun to make.

In other news, I'm still updating my weekly web comic about living in Lyon, Le Spleen en France. It's silly.

Finally, I'm working on redesigning my website. While I like the current style, I feel that it doesn't properly organize my work in an accessible way. It also fails to showcase other things I do, such as cartoons and web design, which are worth putting up (gotta make money somehow).

I've come up with this, and I'm pretty happy with it.

 

Now to actually make it functional...

And you thought you'd had enough

Well, more absurdity is here. Episode 4 of Danger! Relax, Please! has arrived. Dare I say, this is the best one yet.

Fortunately for you and the rest of the internet, this will be the last episode for some time to come...I'm leaving on February 1st to France for six months. There I will be writing, reading, and also drawing a weekly comic for a web publication of which I am a part - Public Organ.


Au revoir!

You're in Danger of not Relaxing again

It's a big, angry family! Episode 3 of Danger! Relax, Please!, my so-called "web series" (called so by me, reluctantly, at a loss for an appropriate term for web shorts celebrating narrative anarchy) is now online! This one features Cornelius the muppet, Angry J's twin brother. WARNING: not for anyone who hates or likes postal humor.

Episode 4 is forthcoming, much sooner than you might think...

In other news, I'm going to be moving to France for six months, starting in February. While this will put a halt to any actual productions I'm currently working on, it will allow me to set aside distractions (see above) and begin writing in earnest. This page will become more about the process of writing for the duration of the spring, until I'm back Stateside, at which time I will begin work on my first feature film.

Happy 2011!

"Contentment" Titling

Contentment was recently invited by the Dallas International Film Festival, and it got me thinking - I should probably finish it. It currently has no credits, and that's kind of important.

I had an idea to do the credits handwritten, since the shooting and editing style was so loose and fluid. It would match better than some computer font. After searching around among my friends and colleagues, testing their handwriting, I discovered my good friend Candace Lewis' handwriting, which is quite nice.

So Candace helped me write out the credits, and now I'm working on photoshopping it into workable titles.

It'll be done soon! 

[EDIT] It's done! Check it out.

Relax Again

Shooting Episode 3 of Danger! Relax, Please! now. Yes, that's Dan McLellan in a sharp tie and 'stache, and yes, that's a "tripod" behind him.

Unfortunately, Boa Simon and Jenny Hou, the DP and star of our show, are leaving for the holidays, and we only filmed half of Episode 3, so we're not going to have the new episode done before 2011. I guess that's what happens when you don't pay anyone.